As the poets of olde Ireland once pondered : '
The apex of Celtic Cakitecture is unquestionably the Celtic Death Barrow. A intoxicating mix of fruit cake, marzipan and poorly judged relationships. Standing at a height of over four metres the barrow becomes an eternal tomb to foolish young lovers 'undying' love. It's three tier design reflects the tripartite nature of most Irish relationships - namely:
Tier 1: 'I love you darling.'
Tier 2: 'Until death do us part.'
Tier 3: 'You f**king b*tch/b*ll*x (select as appropriate) you've ruined me life.'
And I swear by all that's holy if I hear that meaningless word 'Celtic' ever again I'll kugelhopf the living gingerbread out of the cheesecake that says it.
Until next week fellow Dick Turpin impersonators.